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from large cities and in particular from Jews living in New York. Consider the cultural landscape of the earlier part of the 20th century. Jews, of course, do not celebrate Christmas, so they’d be more likely than the Christian majority to go out to eat then, as opposed to their celebrating neighbors who are likely at home with family, roasting their own turkeys and such. And where do they go on Christmas? Well, most restaurants are going to be closed, because their predominantly Christian proprietors and employees are also at home. The major exception, then, was Chinese restaurants. The immigrants running those places were less likely than average to be Christian, so they had no cultural tradition of shutting down on or around December 25. So if you’re a Jewish New Yorker who wants to go out for dinner on Christmas, it’s Chinese food or nothing. This practice may have been popularized in particular by Calvin Trillin, the noted food columnist for the New York Times. He was himself Jewish and wrote a marvelous column about his wife wanting a “traditional holiday dinner.” What she was talking about was the idea, coming in from outside their cultural world, of turkey, mashed potatoes, and so on, but to Trillin, his traditional holiday dinner was going out for Chinese.

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When I was quite small, my family were Jehovah’s Witnesses. My big brothers remembered their Catholic beginnings, they remembered magical Christmases. My little brother and I did not, we’d never been Catholic yet. We used to get very sad that all of our friends had lovely Christmas or Hanukkah, and we did not. We’d pout. My big brothers tried their best to console us. Our best friends lived across the Meowy Catmas Christmas Tree Cats Mask Xmas Quarantine Gift T Shirt . Their dad was not home much, but he was a very stern man. He had quite the temper (when we grew up, we realized that he was always drunk, but when we were small he was just scary). He had a Doberman called Rex who we were all also terrified of. One year, I’m probably four or five, we’re sitting in my brothers’ room wistfully staring out the window at our friends playing with their new toys, wearing their Christmas sweaters, all that. The oldest two brothers, maybe trying to console us, convince us that we do not want Christmas at all. They tell us that Scary Dad is Santa Claus. They tell us that Rex the Doberman is actually Rudolph. Would we really want Rex landing on our roof? Would we really want Scary Dad judging whether we were naughty or nice, and sneaking into our house while we slept?

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